LUCIDITY: MY COMIC ABOUT LUCID DREAMING. Plz check it out
Hello fellow dreamers. My name is Brian and I'm starting a comic book called Lucidity. I've been working on it for a few years now and the first issue is online. I love the art of lucid dreaming and have been studying it for years. I want to share with the world the importance of LD and would love for you all to check it out and give feed back. I only have one issue but the second one is almost done. Please give it a chance...please. Here's the link below.
http://lucidityliveyourdreams.smackjeeves.com/comics/2113834/lucidity/
Thanks again! Hope you enjoy.
I need to reach a laptop to check this out. Can't wait! Welcome xx
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looks great and a lot of work. hope it flies
You're not kidding around, Brian. This isn't amateur hour. That was VERY GOOD, and I want to read the next one. I was expecting you to be a lucid dreamer who thinks they can just doodle out their dreams, but no, it's the other way around. You must already be a comic artist who's dabbling in a lucid dream themed story.
All good super heroes need to start out weak and learn their strengths before they kick ass later. It's enjoyable to watch them develop. It's a great first episode and I want to see him make a comeback and learn the powers of lucid dreaming. Conquering his inner fears may help him grow confidence in his waking life, and of course help defeat the upcoming "evil group of entities whose mission is to invade the minds of humanity causing them horrible nightmares and psychological pain", mentioned in the preface. I also suspect the news report at the beginning is foreshadowing that.
You obviously lucid dream or have read a ton about it, because you depict them very well. His distorted reflection in the mirror was accurate that we all lucid dreamers can relate to. I'm thinking the mysterious child who knows a lot is perhaps a dream character representing his inner child. I met mine once or twice a few years ago, and they were about a 5 year-old version of myself. Those sentient dream characters sure do know a lot more than they are leading on. They can seem just as lucid, if not more so, than I am in a dream! I'm also wondering if the old, blind man will have some sort of wicked lucid dream abilities. He's the wise old man archetype and might become young Michael's, Yoda. He appears weak and disabled, but might be strong in the ways of the LD Force.
I don't know, so I'll have to wait and find out...
If you want feedback, I did notice what I think are some typos:
#7 Page 5 "AN EMOTIONLESS DEVICE THAT AUTOMATICALLY PERFORMS EMOTIONLESS TASK" (Should plural, shouldn't it? "Tasks")
#9 Page 7 "FOR OVER A MONTH THESE NIGHTMARE S HAVE PLAGUED MY NIGHT S" #11 Page 9 "LOOKS LIKE WE GOT COMPANY BOY S" (Maybe it's just my eyes, but it looks like a space before the 'S' when I was reading those lines.)
Other than that, the storytelling and action sequences are flawless in my opinion. It's real professional work. Keep it up!
Michael Miller is my hero!! That was so cool. Definitely provides escapism. The hero's journey is there and we all love the lucid dreaming theme. Great art! Great stuff! 8-)
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Peter wrote: looks great and a lot of work. hope it flies
Thank you so much Peter. Glad you enjoyed it.
Wow, thank you so much Hagart! I really appreciate you taking the time to check out the comic. It's been a long time in the making but comments like the ones people have left and especially one's like yours make it all worth while. I'm not a professional comic book artist but I have been drawing since I was a kid so I guess that counts for something Lol. You are right in suspecting the evil entities might be connected to the news report ;) .
I love lucid dreaming and have been studying it for years. I honestly think it's one of the most fascinating thing I've ever come across and even though I don't have them as often as I would like to I still find myself enchanted by them. I'm glad you picked up on the distorted reflection. Just confirms that it's reaching the exact people I wrote it for, Dreamers (and the rest of the world if they wanna read it lol.)
More info will be out next issue about the mysterious child and the old man (although I will say you might be on to something. ;) ) I will say that the second issue is the true beginning of Micheal's adventure. Thanks for recognizing the typos too. I'll be sure to catch them in the next issue
Once again I truly appreciate your time in reading the comic and the very detailed comment. That gave me major motivation to keep going. Writing, drawing, coloring and creating a budget for the hard copies is challenging but this makes it all worth the effort. Stay Tuned!
[quote="Summerlander"]Michael Miller is my hero!! That was so cool. Definitely provides escapism. The hero's journey is there and we all love the lucid dreaming theme. Great art! Great stuff! 8-)
Lol!!! I'm glad to hear that Summerlander! Thanks for checking it out. I was greatly inspired by Joseph Campbell's writings, so It means a lot to me that those elements are noticeable. More to come soon!
BadJet wrote: I'm not a professional comic book artist but I have been drawing since I was a kid so I guess that counts for something
"A writer writes." I'm sure you've heard that expression. Basically you don't have to be published to call yourself a writer, you simply have to write. The same goes for all art forms. In fact you are published; You're self-published. That's the power of the internet!
You can also get many ideas interacting on this forum, talking to lucid dreamers, and hearing their stories, to incorporate in your own. We're both your major target audience and your focus group.
I was reading it again, and, I'm not a comic aficionado, so I find the style new and exciting and love how on the final page you printed, "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" with the image of hands coming to get him. (That's probably comic book 101, but new to me, and loved that). And on Page 5, final panel, you made the background blurry to make Michael and "The Old Man" stand out. I have an eye for photography and graphic design. Maybe I should read more comics, because I'm a very visual thinker and the messages come across for me easier than reading a book. If only someone made a graphic novel to help me read the most boring book of all time that I flunked in highschool: A Tale Of Two Cities... ( I bet it would still be a waste of time!) ;)
With that said, I have one more quibble. I love the scene on the bus, as Michael is commuting to his mundane job, living in a vapid world hearing that inane girl gossip. But, It was hard to figure out that she was speaking in internet lingo, and once I deciphered it, I still have a question:
She says: "STFOLMAOLOLJK"
I looked up: STFO and apparently it is internet slang, but I have a feeling you meant, STFU. Maybe it should be broken up to make it easier to read as well because it took me a few tries to get it.
The fact that I can only find minor faults like that is because I think it's so good. I'm a fan and want to read the next one.
I even want to make suggestions and talk with other fans, which can be annoying for the original artist, I know, so I'll hold back. Unless you ask.
"A writer writes." Yes I have heard that expression before and with that you have a point. Lol.
I have gotten some ideas with interacting with people on LD sites. Some ideas come from people who I have discussions with about dreams whether they are aware of Lucid dreaming or not. That's an important part for me. I want the comic to not just come from my own experiences but the experiences of others. I want everybody to relate to what Michael experiences one way or another.
I'm happy you went back to giving it a second read. I'm always worried about the replay value of the comic. Each new issue will of course be a continuation of the previous one but I still want each single one to hold up on it's own. Not just a segue to a another part of the story. I love photography and have a deeper love for cinematography. I want Lucidity to feel as if you are watching a movie. A lot of scenes don't have any dialogue at all. I like visually telling a story so even if the text was not there you can still get a good sense of whats going on. Glad you picked up on that! I'm a big film buff and I love art so comics were always amazing to me because they allowed me to have the best of both worlds. I'm a very visual thinker myself just like you. Books (although I appreciate them) never could grab my attention as much as a graphic novel.
When it comes to the internet lingo spoken by the lady on the bus you are right. It's funny how you can proof read something a thousand times and still miss things. Those acronym's are changing constantly so hopefully most people will just breeze past that part and take it as one they never heard before lol.
I always keep an open ear for suggestions. That just means people are connected to the story. Of course I have a plot laid out and have a pretty good idea where the story is going but if you have an idea feel free to share it. There are key points in the story as a whole but how I get there is still in the works. There's so many directions you can take when it comes to Lucid dreaming. I want to explore remote viewing, dream linking and astral plains etc etc. Its all about how to go about it in a way that it serves the story and not just thrown in. Dreamers are my target audience but I also want people who are not familiar with LD and topics related to it to have an easy and fun time as well (not too easy though, we are talking about Lucid dreaming after all ;) .)
Once again Hagart I appreciate your feed back and support. It makes me work harder knowing I have folks out there who believe in the project and want to see it blossom. Seriously. Thank you. 2nd issue coming soon.
One thing I keep imagining is that, after years of blindness, it will be revealed that the old man has developed a third eye with his pineal gland. That would be some cool science fiction. Some speculate it's science fact actually. Perhaps he's a remote viewer and dream sharer and who knows, maybe that child in Michael's dream was him! These aren't meant to be suggestions, just my own mind guessing as a fan.
I wonder who the main villain will be? They're so hard to get right, but are the best character in any story. The best ones don't do things for the sake of being evil, but feel justified in their actions. I wonder what their motive for manipulating minds is? A new world order perhaps that fits their vision of utopia? (Come to think of it, Hitler fits the villain stereotype so well, doesn't he?) I digress. It would be cool if it turns out to be a woman. You're going to need a kick ass female character eventually, and bad girls make great unexpected villains.
I've thought about this before. If dream sharing or dream manipulation were possible, it can be used for both good and evil. Your story has a great premise and who in this world, lucid dreamer or not, isn't fascinated by dreams? It should appeal to just about everybody.
You already have your plan, and did a much better job than I ever could. I trust you know what you're doing. I'm not trying to give suggestions. I'm just making speculations as any fan would, and I might even be right about some of my predictions. If not, and you like them, feel free to use them. I'm sure Gene Roddenberry would like to slap all the Trekkies in the face if he could because fans who think they can help write it better are so damn annoying! :P
Was impressive, but you have some serious flaws in your drawing.
#1 You're not very consistent, examples page 3 Michael's forehead is far to long and his ears too high compared to how you've drawn him otherwise; page 12 Mohawk Man you've drawn him both with a jutting forehead and a sloping forehead.
#2 You draw a lot of teeth, but are really bad at drawing them -you need to seriously work on this.
#3 The emotions and character of your characters are not nuanced enough. The emotions look too like exaggerated mirror faces because of this.
#4 The characters look too much alike, e.g. the demon and Michael have the same face, nose and mouth and a lot of your character look like the same character with their costume changed. I don't know if you intended this or not.
You do draw: bodies; hands and action well though. It was also pretty creative and worth seeing thank you.
Thanks for your honesty and letting me know about some of the flaws within the artwork Snaggle. I can see where your coming from when it comes to the emotions and facial features and I'll try to work on that a bit more. It's funny because I use a program called sketchbook pro and when I got it I immediately started to work on the comic with out learning the program first. So as I drew the comic I was learning the program at the same time. I'm know what I'm doing now so I promise the next one will be more consistent. Hope you'll still read it. Once again thanks for checking it out and I appreciate your feed back. I'll try to improve on those teeth too ;)
Amazing comics I really looking forward to the next ones I wish I could draw like that , few months ago I also wanted to make a comic out one of my lucid dreams. keep up the amazing work ! :D
Ooo~ This was really good. :D
This is WONDERFUL! Love it! Thanks for sharing... :)
You are very creative and I enjoyed your comic 100% Great work!!!!!
Wow. That was great man. Keep up the good work.